Shaunti told me yesterday, while we were watching a very sad movie and I was crying silent tears, that she was trying to collect her tears in an old pop bottle. My question was why? And then, I was reminded there is verse about that in the Bible and told her so. She was amazed and wanted to know where. She also was wondering what the bottle in heaven looked like and how many each person had. I told her I probably have about three big ones by now with all the crying I do.
Tears. Why do some of us cry more easily? Are we weaker? Are we really [those of us who cry] any more compassionate? Are all tears good? Can tears be bad? Why is there shame in tears? Why do we try to hide them? Why do they make the people who don't cry easily uncomfortable?
Here is what I've found out about tears: Some of us cry more easily because we just do. All of us are born with three basic types of tears. First type: basal tears - this is the natural lubrication that coats the eyes and keeps them healthy.
Second type: reflex tears - these happen when sawdust or gnats or other foreign objects hit your eyeball. Or tear gas. Hopefully, that is not something you will ever experience.
Third type: the real deal or in medical terms, psychic tears- these tears are caused by emotional stress, pain, pleasure, anxiety, etc...
Just because a person cries easily doesn't make him/her a more compassionate person. You may be compassionate without the tears. Aren't you glad? I know this one, by personally knowing very compassionate persons who are not emotional and do not cry easily. Also, because people that have tried to make me feel better about my tears have told me that I must be a compassionate person. I know this isn't always accurate about myself because I've had to pray for a heart of compassion over a few matters of which I didn't feel the tiniest morsel of compassion.
Tears are not naturally all good. There are tears of manipulation. The kind a small child might try on a parent or a wife might try on a husband. That is all I want to say about that kind. Tears of self-pity are stemmed from things like: hurt, anger, stress, fear, etc...
If you must be plagued with tears, try to put a finger on whether they are tears that God would want to put in His bottle. It goes against my grain to think He would store up all my tears of self-pity. I know, there are those of you who want to see only the loving, gracious parts of God and you want to believe that He cares about all of you and your babyishness. And He does. But just to clarify, if you want growth and organization in your mind about tears; understanding the emotion behind them can help weed out the ones that are inconsistent with God's desires for you.
He desires you to learn of Him, to die to self daily, to take up His cross and follow Him. There will be good tears in doing that. Tears of surrender, peace, and joy. There will be tears of pain in the fight for wisdom and in the will to do the dying, taking, and following. These are the tears I want God to put in His bottle for me.
If you are emotional and cry a lot of tears, accept the fact that God made you so. Remember those who aren't able to cry and still feel the same turmoil in their souls. I asked Bruce last night where his tears go when he's going through a tough time. I know he has as strong as emotions as I do about things, yet he can 'keep it together' and appear unfazed through the worst of life's storms. He didn't have an answer. He said he didn't know. I know though, that he goes through and deals with things in his own way. Just because he doesn't react with tears doesn't make him unfeeling. As he accepts my outward signs of emotions so well; I accept his as God made him. We are all flawed in some way. Some of us get to show it in our faces out of our eyes.
Here's the verse: Psalm 56:8
Thou tellest my wanderings: put thou my tears into thy bottle: are they not in Thy book?
What do you think about tears?
Tears. Why do some of us cry more easily? Are we weaker? Are we really [those of us who cry] any more compassionate? Are all tears good? Can tears be bad? Why is there shame in tears? Why do we try to hide them? Why do they make the people who don't cry easily uncomfortable?
Here is what I've found out about tears: Some of us cry more easily because we just do. All of us are born with three basic types of tears. First type: basal tears - this is the natural lubrication that coats the eyes and keeps them healthy.
Second type: reflex tears - these happen when sawdust or gnats or other foreign objects hit your eyeball. Or tear gas. Hopefully, that is not something you will ever experience.
Third type: the real deal or in medical terms, psychic tears- these tears are caused by emotional stress, pain, pleasure, anxiety, etc...
Just because a person cries easily doesn't make him/her a more compassionate person. You may be compassionate without the tears. Aren't you glad? I know this one, by personally knowing very compassionate persons who are not emotional and do not cry easily. Also, because people that have tried to make me feel better about my tears have told me that I must be a compassionate person. I know this isn't always accurate about myself because I've had to pray for a heart of compassion over a few matters of which I didn't feel the tiniest morsel of compassion.
Tears are not naturally all good. There are tears of manipulation. The kind a small child might try on a parent or a wife might try on a husband. That is all I want to say about that kind. Tears of self-pity are stemmed from things like: hurt, anger, stress, fear, etc...
If you must be plagued with tears, try to put a finger on whether they are tears that God would want to put in His bottle. It goes against my grain to think He would store up all my tears of self-pity. I know, there are those of you who want to see only the loving, gracious parts of God and you want to believe that He cares about all of you and your babyishness. And He does. But just to clarify, if you want growth and organization in your mind about tears; understanding the emotion behind them can help weed out the ones that are inconsistent with God's desires for you.
He desires you to learn of Him, to die to self daily, to take up His cross and follow Him. There will be good tears in doing that. Tears of surrender, peace, and joy. There will be tears of pain in the fight for wisdom and in the will to do the dying, taking, and following. These are the tears I want God to put in His bottle for me.
If you are emotional and cry a lot of tears, accept the fact that God made you so. Remember those who aren't able to cry and still feel the same turmoil in their souls. I asked Bruce last night where his tears go when he's going through a tough time. I know he has as strong as emotions as I do about things, yet he can 'keep it together' and appear unfazed through the worst of life's storms. He didn't have an answer. He said he didn't know. I know though, that he goes through and deals with things in his own way. Just because he doesn't react with tears doesn't make him unfeeling. As he accepts my outward signs of emotions so well; I accept his as God made him. We are all flawed in some way. Some of us get to show it in our faces out of our eyes.
Here's the verse: Psalm 56:8
Thou tellest my wanderings: put thou my tears into thy bottle: are they not in Thy book?
What do you think about tears?
This is what I think about tears: I hate tears too, But tears are healers, life saving, they do more good than harm. In heaven they are wiped away;not needed any more. I thank God for tears. People who do cry, are real, not fake, most often, even children we accuse of putting on an act, or wives accused of manipulating. Some of could or should cry more. I know the saying is, "Cry and you cry alone, Laugh and the world laughs with you!". Grandma Ruth
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad we can take some of those old sayings and realize they're not complete truth. Thanks for your input, Mom.
DeleteAfter a day of crying "off and on" I found your post. I agree with you, Ruth, they help us heal. I am thankful for tears.
ReplyDelete