My Attempts to Love

And to know the love of Christ, which passeth knowledge, that ye might be filled with the fullness of God...Eph. 3:19

I remember praying for love for others, because I wasn't getting along with them and because I wanted better results from our relationship.

This verse tho, leads me to believe that it's not about my ability to love others so much as it's my 1st priority to love Christ. If I know the love of Christ; I taste and feel the results of knowing in my everyday living. I react correctly to conflict. I don't retaliate or be defensive because my goal is to see how this helps me to know the love of Christ.

It does pass knowledge and understanding. The love of Christ digs deeper into my nothingness and need of Christs' power. "Nothing in my hands I bring, simply to the cross I cling" with everything. Those conflicts or relationships that are too hard for me are helping me to know the love of Christ.

And then, I am filled with the fullness of God...because I know what Christs' love is doing in my everyday. I don't crave better or closer or more security with people anymore; I am filled with the fullness of God...Rid of my piddly attempts to love.